So I've never before gotten high from smoking pot. It's a problem with being neural atypical is chemicals don't necessarily do the same thing for you that they do with most people. Some friends would take this as a challenge and try to get me to smoke the "good stuff" but all smoking pot ever did was make me super hungry and as someone with an anxiety disorder the last thing I need is to be more hungry.

So now pot is legal in Canada and it was suggested that I try edibles because sometimes people who can't get high from smoking it can get high from ingesting it. So I tried a pot gummie bear. It said on the package to eat half and then if you felt nothing after a half hour to try the other half so I did. 2 Hours later still nothing so I went to bed. Then I woke up about an hour and a half later with the worst cotton mouth ever. "Oh, so this is a wonderful side effect. Well at least I'm not hungry". But I also noticed I had what would best be described as a two beer buzz. It was very relaxing but only if I actively relaxed. If I got up (as I did many times to get something to drink) the effect completely dissipated and I was sober but if I laid back and closed my eyes and relaxed I could feel the buzz return. The interesting thing was it was different than booze in that I could literally will myself sober and also I had more control over keeping my thoughts going somewhere dark. If I'm drinking and my thoughts start going to dark places I'm pretty much stuck with having a bad time of it mentally but with this I was able to steer my thoughts away from dark places but I had no control over where else they went and they just went everywhere.

So I was able to lay back and go "Hey brain, this buzz is kinda nice so let's not ruin that. Let's not 'harsh' this buzz. That's what the stoners say, right, 'don't harsh my buzz'. Yeah let's just enjoy this and not go dark. I wonder what a buzz harsh looks like. I bet it's like a little white glowy ball that's all sharp and spiky. Yeah that would harsh a buzz. Like that crystalline entity in Star Trek. That guy is like a giant buzz harsh. Wow that was a really dick move of Lore to summon it. I bet the entire colony was just trying to enjoy a buzz and Lore was being a big dick by harshing it. Like maybe Lore was invented to be some sort of bong for the colony because I've noticed on the internet that stoners become engineers when they need to make a bong. So maybe Soong was just trying to make a bong that could help the colonists get buzzed and Lore was all 'fuck that, not a bong I'm gonna harsh your buzz'. That's cool to not want to be a bong, I get that. But man, that was a dick move to summon a space harsh to harsh their buzz. You know who would probably have benefited from an edible, Buzz Lightyear. Because then he wouldn't be upset to be a toy. He'd be, 'you know, we're all toys in some sense. You know we just want to play, have fun, give pleasure'. If Buzz Lightyear got buzzed he'd probably be okay with it when he was playing the tea party as Mrs Butterworth. He'd be like 'yeah, I'm a little old lady now and that's cool because I'm still playing'. He'd be a really happy Mrs. Butterworth. Wait... his name wasn't Mrs. Butterworth, that's a maple syrup. Oh hey, does everything in the Toy Story universe become alive if it gets played with? Like if you were a little girl and your parents couldn't afford to get you a doll so they gave you an empty Mrs. Butterworth bottle to play with and you played with it as a doll would the Mrs. Butterworth bottle suddenly become alive when you left the room and do shit with the other toys? And what if the little girl also had a rock that she pretended was Mrs. Butterworth's husband, would that rock become alive like the other toys? Would it still identify as Mrs. Butterworth's husband? Would they be happily married. I wonder how Mrs. Butterworth would feel? Would she feel worth? Or would she feel just really empty because she doesn't have syrup inside her anymore. Wow, I bet it would be great that she's married to a rock then because then when she's feeling down the rock would be like, 'hey, that's okay, I'm still here for you. I'll be your rock'. Then she might not feel so empty because you know, she has a rock. And maybe sometimes the little girl might fill up the empty Mrs. Butterworth bottle with koolaide or juice or even just water. I bet Mrs. Butterworth would really like to be filled with koolaide. It would probably make her feel young like when she was filled with syrup. Yeah I'd like some koolaide right now. My mouth is so dry. I'm gonna get some koolaide".

Then I'd get up and open my eyes and be instantly sober and going "what the hell was all that? that wasn't normal? Is that what pot does to regular people that smoke pot? Does it make them just follow every random thought in their heads with no aim or direction?" And I'd go get a drink, then go lay back down and close my eyes and wait until the two beer buzz feeling came back and I'd end up following another random thought train until I eventually noticed how thirsty I was again. And this went on for about 2 hours until I lost the two beer buzz feeling.

The other really nice thing was my arthritis didn't bother me nearly as much as it does normally. Even the next day my arthritis didn't seem to hurt quite as much.