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I'm an internet has-been. I play accordion and draw lots and lots of dick-girls.

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We found you.

Posted by GhastlyH - June 16th, 2019


Human civilization ended more than a thousand years before we even found your planet. Our archaeologists found your planet teeming with life but evidence was clear that it was recovering from a great ecological disaster and we uncovered evidence of your once thriving civilizations. You had killed yourselves off before you ever got to leave your world and join the universal civilization. Your culture, dreams, ambitions, all dead and gone. We were able to piece together a pretty good idea of what humans were, what their major historical events were, who their major players were but the day to day stuff, the small stuff, that's harder to pick out. We were sad that no mind would ever again know what it is to be a human. We were sad that you had destroyed yourself before we ever had a chance to meet you, to welcome you to our cosmic family. So we did what we've done countless times we've encountered evidence of intelligent life that had destroyed itself before we could know it.


We studied the artifacts until the artifacts had nothing more to tell us and then we created this world so we could know you. You exist here in this simulation that we've run based on the data we've collected. A simulation that has been making digital human minds since the australopithicines when you weren't even what you would recognize as human to now when your species is reaching its natural conclusion. Is our simulation perfect? No. Of course not. But if we took an average biological human that actually existed in the universe and transferred him to this one he would probably not notice much different. The later stage of humanity was actually the easiest to simulate because you accumulated so much data. Social media captured so much minutiae. In the next decade when an organization sets about archiving the entire contents of the internet as data etched into quartz crystals it's all this data you dismiss as fluff, meaningless ego pandering trivia that becomes the most important data for understanding what the human experience was. You're very fortunate as many sapient species go extinct before they are able to preserve their knowledge in a format that can last more than a billion years, and few ever think it important enough to save so much of their knowledge in the event that someone other than themselves would ever need it. Your vanity was ultimately your saviour. The universe still knows the human mind.


And human minds will continue. The extraordinary of you we cherish. When their simulated time comes to an end they will join us. Most intelligent life in the universe exists digitally as machine minds. Its really the only practical way to explore something as big as the universe when you're limited to such slow travel speeds and when so much of it is hostile to organic life. When we wish to have an organic experience we can always grow ourselves a body of a species of our choice and transfer ourselves to it but really there isn't much you can do organically that you can't do mechanically. Some of you will understand this when your simulation ends and you are invited to join us. Those of you who are creative, curious, compassionate, you will understand. So enjoy what little of the simulation there is left to run. The end of organic human life is unavoidable. Like I said, it happened more than a thousand years before we discovered your world. But the human mind? The best of them will be immortal.


Oh shit! If forgot to put :::SPOILER ALERT::: on the top of this.


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Comments (1)

The world hasn't ended yet this is just the beginning...